How to persist when you don’t want to.

The trouble about an addiction is that it never goes away. Of course it goes away from the front of your mind, but an addiction is your friend for life. It is impossible to get rid of it, so there is no point in trying to pretend it is gone ‘cos it ain’t. However just because it hasn’t gone away, doesn’t mean that it has to dominate your life anymore. An addiction is not cured, it is just managed. Management of something takes care and some attention, but after a while it may not need as much attention, but it always needs some attention, like a pet. Whatever your addiction needs to be managed into quiesence, that’s what you have to do, no more no less. If it rears its head again, it needs more management; if it is not making your life or the lives of those around you a misery and if it ceases to be a behavioural part of your life, then you are probably managing it adequately. However ignoring it is not the same as managing it. It always requires attention, if only a small amount of attention. Not bothering to give it any attention is the same as asking it to dominate your life again. Your addiction’s response to being totally ignored is guarenteed: it will come back again, it’s return is a certainty. And that is the message you need to hear every day: if I don’t pay attention to my addiction, it will pay attention to me. So find a way to get your self that message every day, through a self help group, like AA, through talking to a sponsor, through prayer, through a counsellor, through an online forum. Every day should involve some effort at being reminded at what a full addiction is like. A gentle easy reminder can be as effective as a big reminder, but you must make some effort to be reminded. An effective reminder will provide motivation to remain abstinent. Motivation is not acquired in single large dolops, it is acquired in daily small reminders. A daily small effort can provide a lifetime of benefit. Persistence is a gentle small effort that can pay big dividends. Every day.

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